Simmering Potpourri

1 apple, sliced
2 tbsp. ground nutmeg
2 sticks cinnamon
2 tbsp. whole cloves
1 tsp. vanilla
1 tbsp. dried orange peel (or fresh peel)
2 c. water

Mix all ingredients in small pan. Simmer for 1 to 2 hours. Refrigerate when done. Reheat next day, adding a little water (as it will thicken). Always add water each time mixture is reheated. Keep refrigerated.Nice to use before visitors arrive or to eliminate unpleasant cooking odors.

Under His wing.

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I was terribly sick over the weekend. The smell of anything made me nausious, and forget about eating. I spent Friday night until Monday morning, sleeping and on the coach.

I tried to stay awake as much as possible, so that I would sleep at night and maybe wake rested the next day. So, in an effort to stay awake, I watched TV. I usually don't watch TV, because I just don't have time. Watching it over the weekend solidified some things for me. Mainly stuff I already knew, but a reminding never hurts. I'm not really missing anything, by not being a consistant watcher. Also, that I am terribly happy right where I am.

I kinda picture myself as a duckling, warm and comfortable under God's wing. It's safe there, and I am loved and cared for, as long as I am under that wing. Every now and then, I get a little restless. I wonder if maybe I am missing something. Like the wing might be protecting me a little too much. The world outside that wing could be fun and exciting, and I wonder if I am missing out on really cool things, because I am under this wing.

So, on the coach I lay, miserable and tired, and under God's wing. Then it's like he lifts his wing so that I can have a peek at exactly what I am missing. The rest just plays alot like a horror show.

I flipped through channels of music that I once loved, that now seem to have absolutely no meaning. No thought, no concern of the content of the video and who might see it. THE SONG MEANS NOTHING! It's like they took one sentence, put it to music, and didn't even attempt to tell you what is so special about that sentence. CRAZY!

Flipping again, through channels of entertainment "news". More accurate to just call it the Gossip channel. So and so may or may not have done this, but maybe did that. Evidentally there are alot of people at these stations who can see the future and will tell you all about what they think it holds. If it's not gossip they will just talk about intimate things, because that is all their watchers want to know about anyway. TRASH!

Flipping, flipping, flipping.... off. I'm down for a nap at this point. Rather sleep all day than watch the craziness that people call entertainment. This wing is what my son would call "snuggly", and I LIKE snuggly.

Gingerbread Waffles

1 cup all-purpose flour
1 cup whole wheat flour
3 teaspoons baking powder
2 teaspoons ground ginger
2 teaspoons cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon nutmeg
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 eggs
1/4 vegetable oil
1/4 cup brown sugar
13/4 cups buttermilk
1/2 cup molasses
Mix dry ingredients together, mix wet ingredients
then combine. Use batter in any waffle iron. Serve
with fruit and syrup.

Devon'

She was Texas.

So I have been rolling it over in my mind. It just keeps coming up, how would I describe her? It just throws itself in the front of my brain, like a great dane trying to give you a hug. I can't look past it, it's right there, in my face.

She passed away lastnight. I couldn't make it there, too far to go, too little time left. I spoke with her, or to her rather. There has been no speaking with her, in a long time. Just memories of when she remembered me. Mom said she smiled when I talked to her... I'll take that.

The next call came at 12:48am. It was time. Half asleep I thanked God for letting us be a part of her life, and prayed that He would open his arms wide and draw her into Him. She took two more breaths, and ran to His love.

So here I sit, thinking if ... when people ask me about her, what would I say. The horrible stories, have long since overshadowed the good ones. I would love to describe a woman who put family first, inspired everyone she met, was an amazing encourager, and could cook like nobodies business. That wasn't her. Don't get me wrong she loved, I know she loved, because she loved me. I think I got the best of her. I got church on Sunday morning. I got reading her entire collection of Nancy Drew. I got picking veggies out of the garden, and taking them straight to the table to eat. I got the stories on her bed at night. Her and peepaw laughing, in their meat locker of a bedroom, that smelled like Vicks Vapor rub, and me half screaming half laughing at peepaw as he rubbed his whiskery cheek on my face.  I got a solid day of being amazed that she had a computer, and another solid day of trying to figure out how to show her e-mail.

So how do you balance that, what do you call that. It's Texas. It's rough and tough. It's romance and spurs. It's home cooked meals and breaking your back to break that horse. That was her, she was Texas. She wore boots, with her long jean skirt, and a red scarf tied around her neck. Bright red lipstick and a quick tease to the hair, because everything is bigger in Texas. Her favorite song was yellow rose, Her favorite flower, the bluebonnet. Lady Bird Johnson was everything she aspired to be. She kept Old Milwaukee in business, and burned every brisket she laid hands on. She was spicy like the food, and had a laugh that made her eyes dance like a west Texas night. She would fight till she saw blood, if you messed with her family; and she would turn around and spank us all for making her do it. She made a 3 hour drive into a 6 hour drive, because   she loved the mountain view; and she entertained the truck drivers the whole way. She was hard work and hard play. She was every bit of Texas. You could breath her in, like you do the Gulf breeze. You could marvel at her beauty, like east Texas. She could sneak up on you like a dust storm out west, and she could flat lay you out, like a winter panhandle. If ever there were a word more fitting, SHE WAS TEXAS. She will always be Texas to me.

What the future holds....

Amazing opportunity to hear the testimony of Pastor Alfonso, who is the Chaplin for the Yankees. He talked about a life of drugs. Parents ditching him at the age of 8 or 10. It was crazy how God has taken this child that was living a life of total chaos and destruction, to reaching so many for the Lord.

As he spoke, I remembered a time a couple of years ago. Little back story. My younger brother moved in with us a couple of years ago. He had some drug abuse going on, and we really wanted him to get away from that environment. Away from his drug sources, and surrounded by Christian people that would love on him. I will say that we are/were a little naive to drug addictions. However, it seemed to be helping for a while. We really made one firm rule. All other things, could be worked around, but there would absolutely be no drugs in our house. We have children, and that is not acceptable in our environment.

He stayed with us, and attended church with us, for almost a year, when he came home high. Much as it broke my heart, we told him he had to leave. I absolutely stand firm, that we did the best things for our children, by making him leave. However, where God's conviction gets me, is that I was sooooo angry. So mad that he would dare to bring that around my kids, that he would lie to me. That he would choose to throw away the home and opportunities that we were trying to provide for him.

I am realizing that I definitely did the right thing, but that I did not do it in Christ's love. I haven't been angry for a while, but I know that I did not approach the process in a way that could have glorified God.

I got a call from my little brother the other day. First real conversation we have had in a long time, it was his birthday, and sissy wanted to wish him well. The first time that I wanted to talk to him, and not just get the conversation over with. I wanted to see, really see, how he was doing. He  is working in a machine shop, and he said it was really weird that he is the only one in the shop that doesn't have a faithful relationship with Christ. :) Thank you God. Disappointed that it wasn't me, but glad that you are sending others.

Lord, I am excited to see where you will take this boy, and how you will use him. Does skateboarding need a Chaplin? HMMMMMMM.....

Living with grief.

Amazing interview from Steven Curtis and Mary Beth Chapman. Check it out. http://www.focusonlinecommunities.com/community/webcasts/2010/0901

Entry into my "blessings" journal, from camp natchamama '09

We did the "challenge course" today. One challenge was to scale a 8-10 ft. wall, with only 1 person to help you up. I went up , and  had to help Juliette up. I was able to held her, but not pull her anymore. The people below gave her a boost & she was able to swing a leg over. As she did, she looked at me and told me to let go of one of her hands.... I couldn't do it. All I could think of was what if she falls, it will be all my fault because I let go. After enough protest, I let go and she was able to swing over and get up. I had to let go , and put her in God's hands.

Daddy, I'm scared.

So, it's been a rough day. One of those days where the panic sets in. All day, I have been freaking out a little bit about Frank's job prospects. There is something so very unsettling about him not having a job. I am fully aware that God will provide, I have seen it time and time again. It's amazing how he works, how his math isn't the same as mine, and how he provides exactly what I need when I need it. I have countless stories of his provisions in my life. Still, there is comfort in having a stable income, and on the flip, very uncomfortable when you don't. Especially for me, I'm a planner. I like to have a plan, stick to the plan, and for everything to go... as planned. God has worked on me with that. I don't freak out as much anymore about my plans :). Doesn't mean I don't "love it when a plan comes together" (thanks Hannibal).

So, today was rough. Hard to plan anything, until you know what you can base it off of. As I drove home tonight, I fell apart. "Daddy, I feel like you are leading me blindfolded. I don't know which way we are going, and what the destination is. I'm scared Daddy.". Then I felt the Lord say to me " you may not know where you're going, but you know me. You know who I am. You know I love you. You know that even if you can't see what is going on, you know that I would never lead you to a place where you would be harmed." hmmmmm, he always knows just what I need.

So, it occurs to me. If someone blindfolds you, it is usually to surprise you. Can't wait to see what's ahead!

Takes more than a day, to build a house.

I am sitting here, just thinking about some of the damaging things that have happened in our lives over the past several years. It's amazing to me because, I feel/have felt, so destroyed. I keep wandering why, God just hasn't allowed me to wake up one morning, and be over it. I keep expecting that one day I will just be okay with everything.

Let me clarify, first off, I'm not wallowing in this. My heart is broken, but God is hugging me through the tears. I fully know that the path I am on, is where God has me, and what is best for me. It is just that the path has some briers along the way, and when I get a thorn in my foot, it hurts for a while, but God pulls it out and kisses my boo boo's. So, I don't question where I am and what God is doing. God has blessed me, and I am seeking the Joy in everything. Still the moments come...

So, back to sitting here. Thinking, God I just have these moments when the lump in my throat rises, and the magnitude of it all envelopes me. Will I just have a day when I will wake up and the lump will be gone, heart mended? It made me think about building a house. When you pick out your plans and say build it, part of you wants it to just be done. But the faster it is built, the more likely that corners are cut, and the house is not as stable as you anticipate. To build the house, you have to be patient. You have to go back, choose a different color, different carpet, different hinges for the door; because the original choices just wont work well. It is what is best for the house, and everyone in it; for you to be patient and flexible. At the end, when all your decisions are made, you have a house that withstands the storms, protects your family, and is a sanctuary.

So, here I am, being patient while God builds me up; to withstand the storms, protect my family, and be a sanctuary.

Still standing firm on Psalms 62:5-8

Great Devotional on forgiveness

A friend of mine facebooked a really great devotional today from Proverbs 31 ministries, on forgiveness. It really hit home with me. I had my feelings hurt recently, and have tried to put on a "happy face", but had not forgiven this person. So, this really hit home. I am choosing to forgive bc that is what my father calls me to do.

If you want to read it, click on the button at the bottom of the page for Proverbs 31 ministries. It is todays devotion.

Earthday deals

Okay, I stink at blogging. I haven't posted a thing since BLACK FRIDAY!!! WOW! Let's not even talk about my Myspace account! I do want to post this, bc I am sooooo excited about my killer ink refills. Here are some of the Earthday deals you can get in on : (compliments of Southernsavers.com)

Walgreens has $1 ink refills - today only, and you will need to get a coupon out of the flyer ( that is always near the front door.

Books A Million
Bring your own reuseable travel mug and get a FREE cup of brewed coffee.
Bring your own resuseable bag and get 20% off everything you get inside of it (for discount card, non members get 10% off the entire bag)!
Get a FREE Lorax Bookmark and seeds

Drop by CVS, grab a FREE bag tag


These don't really apply to us, but if you have family that live out of time, maybe they can use it (or you can convince them to hook you up. hint hint mom :) )


Disney store, give them my 6 bottles or cans, get a free Disney Friends for Change youth baseball cap

Head to the Origins counter at Dillards to get a FREE Origins Cleanser when you trade in a current skin care product


OK, that's all I got (for Jill, "That's all I have." :) Love having English teachers as friends tee hee hee). See you again in... what... like 6 months? :)